I think this is as much to do with education about what 999 is for as it is dealing with idiots.

Until I started reading your blog, I really wasn’t aware that Emergency Dispatch did as much over the phone diagnostic and first aid as you frequently describe. 999 is frequently painted in the media as being no different in process to a pizza delivery service: call, place your order, give your details and hang up. I can’t remember the level of medical advice you give over the phone being depicted in The Bill or any other mainstream TV or film.

Crying shame some passerby didn’t give The Interrupter a smack in the earhole.

Didn’t The Bill used to do the “Ambulannce! Now!” thing? Now I think they avoid all that by cutting to another scene or something. Not that I watch it much now. It’s gone downhill something cruel.

5 minutes is very rare — it sometimes gets that long on very hot days (like the ones we’ve had recently) and pub closing time at weekends, but normally people get straight through.

Totally agreed on the 999 education point too. Even Casualty does the “15 High St, Holby, ambulance now *click*” thing. Don’t these programmes do any research?? If they showed a proper 999 call once in a while, people would know what to expect. The only TV programme I have ever seen dealing with 999 education in a useful way was, wait for it, The Tweenies. Perhaps this explains why children are the best callers of all!

As a first aider at work we were taught be St John. They were very good about teaching how to take control of a scene, how to spot the idiots and always - unless directed otherwise - stay on the line until the ambulance arrives. We were taught to try and find a job for the interupter, like go and stand in a corner somewhere and look important….

The last 999 call I made for an ambulance was a truck Vs bike accident. By the time the ambulance arrived there was me and a bloke how taught first aid at work and 4, yes 4, other registered first aiders had stopped with their first aid kits at the ready. We thanked them politely and sent them on their way. There were so many cars stopped to help we were afraid the calvery wouldn’t be able to get through! Anyway, with the exception of cuts, bruises & shock the cyclist was ok.

Glad to be of some use

I appreciate the Interrupters don’t know how the 999 system works, but if they were prepared to listen for five seconds, I would be able to tell them “we’re arranging help while I’m talking to you”. That’s the third thing I say to callers (after “what’s wrong?” and “what’s the address?”) and the first thing I say if someone new comes on the line. Interrupters are the type of people who always think they know better than you and want the first word, the last word and all the words in between.

[...] Nee Naw [...]

I saw a Interrupter the other week, pulled the phone out of a mad screaming girl. and almost calmly started talking. and it basicly went like this. man with ‘injury type to injury area’ at ‘ almost full address no postcode’ aged XX.
and stayed on the phone until the ambo arrived.

I bet that a Interrupter you would like to see.

We did have a show called ‘999′ in the UK - dramatised versions of emergency calls. I don’t know it it’s still on, but I watched it growing up. They’d often focus on the callers who took instructions over the phone, so the role of the operator was quite clear. They often interviewed operators too, if I recall.

It was fascinating and inspired me to take basic first aid classes a a kid.

Maybe when on hold, between speaking to the BT operator and getting through to the NeeNawers, soothing music should be played to callers. I used to be involved with hospital radio, and was always amused at how many patients requested The Verve’s 1997 number one chart hit…

More seriously, at times when there _is_ a queue, maybe useful recorded information could be played whilst callers are waiting to get through? This might include a short announcement explaining how the call process works, or even information on “What to do if the patient isn’t breathing…”.

A useful phrase for an interuptor or someone who’s getting in the way “Don’t just do something, stand there!!” (as opposed to don’t just stand there, do something) Seems to work a treat, I’ve never yet had someone figure out what you’ve actually said, and like you say they go off and do their importand job such as “wait until you see the ambulance and then do your best impression of a windmill.”

There are lots of things on the National Curriculum that don’t need to be there; unfortuneatly there are one or two important things missing.

I rarely comment - not my field at all, for a start, and I’m just full of admiration for those who do work in it - but for once I find myself hoping that this time those involved, particularly Ms Interrupter, reads your blog and works out just who she is. Ok, as I see others have said, not everyone’s aware that the dispatchers can also give first aid instructions, but even so. Seems to me that hanging up on someone who can help takes a special kind of stupid.